Sept, 9, 2008. I wrote this months ago with other stuff but i thought i would share this.
Ok here goes. Every journal entry can be so different because sometimes I write from my emotions fo the moment and sometimes Im not serious, sometimes I write my deepest thoughts that can only make sense to me but not in ink!
With that said I hope I can look back at all these enteries and smile. Because I have learned-loved-felt sorrow-survived-sinned-hated grown to whom I am today!
Future Children if you ever read this I have lived before you for a reason. I hope my life can impact yours in some small way. I will teach you from what I have learned-share all my sweet and sour moments. If i could just have you understand one thing...We are NEVER finished product! We make mistakes every min of the day. Always be humble and open to everyone! Its not our job to judge or make assumptions of others. YOu can change your life any time of the day. I have changed some of my values and thoughts on certain things recently. I can change them once again. The heartache of sin is the worst feeling I have ever felt! But I can not rewind time! Therefore, Love yourself! Repent and do not repeat that heavy burdon sin. Be ready for it, I pray that you never have to go down this road but God and If I am alive will be your support!
*Friends* I dont want anyone to tell you that its not important who your friends are! I was always strong growing up no one influenced my character..I thought but those you spend time with can make you feel better about your life in small ways. My life would NOT be the same today if I didnt have my strong-great-example- happy-trustworhty friends :) I love each one of them and they have taught me more in those years than anyone else. Typically our life especilally at a young age. Choose the ones that will help you complete them with good decisions! I can not express that enough. Find a love and love it everyday possible. I did and it was sports :) ha I was goood at it too.
Knowledge in some life categories can possibly let your guard down with curiosity. Anytime growing up I heard talk of sex, profanity, things that destroy your happiness in the long road I gladly did not participate! And boy im i happy i did. Knowing what i know now!
I was not stupid and didnt need to know how to do certain things. If you stay away from it-that alone will protect you. Curiosity hurt me and i will always bleed from that wound. Meaning the things i have experienced were all wrong for the moment and time i trusted in those i shouldnt. The Holy Ghost should be your guidance then one you trust! Its so hard to change without those great friends encouraging you helping you love yoursef. Ive had my moments but I survived the lowest depression in my life! All in my life helped me but sometimes thats what its about this life. Helpting those around us to live with our father again. Be with those that only love you for TRUTH! THey will never want to hurt you and If they do(they will) they will feel worse than you! BE an example for those around you! I hope one of my kids can draw ;) There was more but its get even more personal if you can imagine :) ha
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
You always write such wonderful words and your future children will read this and KNOW you are the mom to talk to about anything and everything. You don't judge, you don't force and you love unconditionally, that is what makes you YOU. Now that the last crappy chapter in your life is over, moving on and becoming that parent you want to become...that is a really worthwhile objective, that YOU can handle. You have it in you to be who you want to be...and you can reach it. Those outside influences are just that...outside.
I loved this blog! Thanks for sharing it :]
Aftan, all of this will make perfect sense when you hold your future children. All of these moments that seemed like mistakes and seem so BIG will get smaller and smaller as time goes. Sin does hurt & even after repenting it continues to hurt. There is a reason for that. The Lord will not take away that hurt - and it doesn't mean that you are not forgiven. That hurt is a reminder of that sin so even though we can be forgiven, we will never forget. We need to remember the pain and the sufferings so that we can call on it later when we are tempted yet again. Over the years it will slowly diminish and almost disappear, but you will always carry some of it with you... for this reason. I can recall every major sinful decision I have ever made and the feelings that went along with them. I know it sounds wierd, but I am grateful for that pain. Grateful that I know how it feels to choose wrong and how good it feels to choose right.
Post a Comment